The Cat's Rebuttal

Last week I wrote about dogs and their understanding of words.
My cat was not amused, so here's the low-down on cats, in her own words.







"Of course we understand every word you speak, but you are silly and inconsequential, so we do not deign to respond.

If we wanted to go somewhere in the car, we'd drive ourselves. In fact, we do, at night, when you're asleep. I've been to Detroit twice and Chicago once in the last year.

Less is more to a cat. A tiny bump with my head means more than all the gyrating those dumb dogs do to get your attention, so be grateful.

Oh, and one more thing: When I play, even if I look silly or accidentally fall off the couch in the process, I expect you to keep quiet about it. Is nothing sacred?"